Adrian/ Poet/ 18/ California bred/ Chuck bass life/ completely apathetic
do you ever just wonder if there’s someone who secretly thinks about you and wants to talk to you but doesn’t know how
Woke up with an empty feeling at the pit of my stomach.
Pretty sure my type is white, ex gf probs up the ass, blonde, colored eyes, broken mentally, and a Gemini.
Yep that bout sums it up.
Today started off wonderfully. I got to wake up hella early for a not so hard hike at crystal cove with the girl I’ve been dating for a couple weeks now. Then we had lunch and we kissed blah blah blah. I got to thinking, “let’s say this gets serious. Let’s just say we actually go steady.” How the fuck do I tell my parents, who know I’m gay but are still I’m denial? I feel guilty because I want them to be apart of my life because this girl is pretty awesome. So I get home and straight up tell my dad. He gives me this lecture about how this wrong then gets mad at me for not telling him about her since day 1. And basically expects me to be straight up with my gayness with him all the time. It’s really so much harder than that because my mom is outright against it. Like I’m not even open to my coworkers (Cynthia or domo if you’re reading this…surprise I’m gay. Have been since day 1. Just act straight so I don’t have to explain myself).
Anywho I tell my dad and now he’s making me tell my mom. Great.
If that weren’t enough the girl that I’ve liked since summer but never gave me the time of day texts me saying she misses me and wants to go out with me. I wanted to shoot myself with a nail gun in the eyes because
1. I’ve wanted nothing more than to date this girl for the past 8 months.
2. She would do this to me when I’m in a good place with my current girl.
3. I want to change my habits so bad. Juggling 1 girl is already hard enough.
Fuck my life.